writings

he somehow managed
to puncture a hole
in his right eye.
i slowly examined it,
how it let the light in
it drew it right in…
and then, me with it.
thus now i am lost
inside him,
for all the world to see

i find myself in an eerie state of perfection within chaos. wondering about things i already know the answers of, yet they are not fully resolved. and so things turn more chaotic. there is more to surrender, there are more walls, steel doors, endless oceans. black holes as well. no matter the distance or hardship, the ultimate truth will always arise, so ok – death is release in its most ultimate form; freeing that which could never be caught and kept to begin with, except for within illusionary parameters – could it be that i just need to find the light switch?

one of the worst recurrent dreams i have is of being in the dark and not being able to turn on the light. while something is coming.

i feel something is coming.

birds

we’ve got nothing left to say to each other
so we just circle around one another
like birds
but heavier

not quite sure when to finally
move into the opposite direction

perhaps the idea of infinite space really does scare us
and it seems more safe to have each other as a point of reference
as if this would keep us from getting lost

as if life does not
at some point
totally dump us

back onto the earth, into the soil
our bones our last remainders
for other birds to peck at

the sun roasts my
flesh as i set fire
to bridges – these
wooden bridges that
are in bad shape and
very unsafe – and i
watch them burn from
a distance as the sun
sets and gives way to
a more cool air and my
skin still glows red.
nature has a way of
taking care of things.

i discovered mountains, climbed to the top, and exploded. my body turned into a cloud of atoms, and they spread wider and wider until the air was clear again. i returned to the earth, and i will rise up again, take on another form, and find you.

as i lay hidden beneath the soil, i dream in lava. my wishes turn into red hot veins that run through the earth, reminding you that

i am here.

at night as you conquer my body and peek through my ribs you discover all these little cracks in my heart as dark blood spills from them but in the morning as the sun rises and i stretch out my arms and open up my chest they let the light in and you open up […]

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