“if i would have found it, i might not be as happy as i am now, searching the world for it.”
i softly moan. bring my body to a halt. press myself against the wall. arms up. one arm slowly falling down. i press my face against the cold white concrete, left cheek first, then roll my face over to the right side. i open my eyes and look behind me over my left shoulder. the room is empty.
but you are there.
you see me and i know you understand.
in this moment, i am as fragile as only you know me to be. as possessed as your love requires me to be. as consumed by it as no one else ever possibly will be able to be. my heavy eyes and slow soft breathing show you how i fully embody this force that beckons us. this weight at times.
not only did you teach me about my soul. but also about the heart of my soul.
the ache comes not from within my body. but deeper. nothing physical can control it, for it is beyond our reach. all i can do is let it come through. feel how it reminds me of you. it brings me to a place interwaved with this one, a place outside of time. somewhere else, where we always already are.
i surrendered myself to time the moment i understood it. no matter what pulls or what gives. what is ultimately, true, is.
these bodies we are in. they greet each other and smile.
“i think a storm is coming.”